there are no birds
only the wind
and the howl of wolves
beyond the silence
we are alone
there are no clouds
only the wind
confusion spins
the crag of Lady Hill
we are alone
there is no sun
only the wind burns
the air is thin
within these walls
we are alone
we build brick upon brick
and watch the flickering walls
waiting for the storm
the Tower stands alone
in this Border land
we dance upon the battlements
so good to see you
smoke-eyed stranger in the night
with blood on your teeth
when you spark that talk
sly fruit bloom on sullen trees
starlings fall like snow
I remember you
burning sweet Ballachulish
heather by the lake
in a hotel room
shadowed by the Three Sisters
and scented orange
we hoped our extinct
volcano might come to life
in that flash of light
You come and go with the darkness.
I never see you leave but after snowfall
I see your footprints across the lawn.
You sleep alone at night in the shadows
under my exhaustion, a luminescence.
You keep one golden eye open
just in case I forget myself.
Your eye seeps around my raw edges
like cyanide, like a cloud of mustard gas,
like radiation in the house of the apocalypse.
I’m sealing myself in with duct tape,
pulling down blinds, wearing dark glasses;
a hermit with only Transcendental Meditation
and a half-empty glass for company.
If only you were a little kinder,
I would welcome you with my blood.
December morning
slivers sky through my opening
death in slow motion
Happy Winter Solstice to all!
She never learned the 60% rule,
hungry swarms disappearing.
Small insects under her skin,
no place for strangers.
Cracking pistachios late October,
a bumble of dogs bark at the fish truck.
She was arrested for public indecency,
a memory, bare arsed in a sacred place.
Time was up. At the border
she never heard church bells.
The day stripped naked, intersecting
her space with signs.
The sun more pink now. She swatted
it flat and bloody with her hand.
finally upright
and braced
swinging dead
legs between
parallel bars
I struggle
towards reflections
of myself
one step
after another
says physio
walk tall
says physio
good girl
says physio
visiting hour
enter mother
face crumpled
and pale
my baby
is broken
she says
